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Looking for the words

Looking for the words

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“God give me the words,” I prayed last night. Knowing that I needed to write this column this morning, I couldn’t decide what to write about. There has just been too much to share and now that I had a break from work and feeling better, I have so many ideas for blog posts and writing, I couldn’t decide.

When I left on my week long adventure I told my husband that I just needed to get out of my own head for a little bit. He just looked at me funny and I didn’t even try to explain because I knew I didn’t have the words.

I have spent time in Missouri, Arkansas and Oklahoma since I last wrote and drove through Kansas late Sunday on the Labor Day weekend.

The weekend of August 23-25 I spent with my NATRC friends helping with a competitive trail ride near Smithville, Missouri. The weather was perfect until it rained buckets and the time I was able to spend with my friends was so much fun. I haven’t laughed like that for a long time. It was good for my heart.

I drove to my Aunt’s house on the border of Arkansas on the 25th and spent a couple of days junking around Fort Smith, Arkansas and Arkoma, Oklahoma. Mostly, I just enjoyed visiting with my aunt, uncle and cousins. Catching up on what was important in their lives and relaxing.

My family made me feel so welcome, so loved and it was just what I needed. I ate the best home cooked meals of fried chicken, biscuits and gravy, bacon and eggs.

On the 28th of August I drove to stay with my cousin in Hugo, Oklahoma. My Aunt and Uncle followed and we continued our adventure and eating.

My cousin’s husband is Choctaw Indian and after my recent experience with “The Loss of Turtle Island” at my church, I wanted to learn more about their culture. He took us to the Choctaw Museum which was fascinating.

I had committed to helping at a NATRC ride in Boswell, Oklahoma which was only a twenty minute drive from my cousin’s house over Labor Day Weekend. I thought at one point that I was going to die during a jeep adventure, but that’s a story for another time.

I had planned to spend my week reading and writing, but I didn’t get any of that done. I ate a lot, slept well and found my way out of my head. Although I don’t know that I still have the words to explain it, my week long adventure was just what I needed.

“God give me the words” I found myself praying before I helped lead the Women of Faith Story Workshop. The weekend was amazing and I learned to “be ready, you never know how God is going to use you.”

I prayed “God give me the words” again before I spoke to a group of women in Wilber last week about the importance of their story and the value of community.

Yesterday, in church I found myself praying “God give him the words” for our pastor as he was overcome with emotion. He has the opportunity to farm with his family in Kansas, which he has longed for, but it means leaving this community. I’m so excited for them, but sad too.

My take-away from the last four weeks of living has been “God will give you exactly what you need - even if you don’t know what that is - when you need it. Be ready.”

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